If you’re
on facebook, you might recall me posting a ‘plea for help’ back in mid-December,
following the General Election result (which also effectively ruled out any
chance of continued EU membership)? In my virtual world, perhaps well in excess
of 95% of my 650 FB friends probably didn’t vote Conservative (and I fully appreciated that there’s another
virtual world out there for whom exactly the opposite is true).
Against this background, I wanted to
meet up with some Tory-voters… although I vehemently disagreed with the vast majority of
Tory policies, I thought the time had come to try to heal some of the wounds (a
tall order - but you know what I mean!).
I wanted to meet a few Tory-voters to chat and compare our current thoughts, concerns, hopes and aspirations. Clearly, I didn’t want to try to ‘convert’ this Tory voter (and, equally, didn’t want to talk to anyone who thought they could persuade me to support Mr Johnson!)… but I did (and do) think there’s an awful lot of healing that needs to happen. These proposed meet-ups wouldn’t be confrontational in any way – they would just be an opportunity to discuss political stuff in a calm, rational (and, who knows, even humorous) way - with me buying the first round!
For the record (in case you didn’t know), I’m a 71 year-old member of the Green Party. I live in Bristol. I’m a retired architect (and ran a successful, medium-sized Buckinghamshire practice for getting on for 30 years). I’ve been very happily married for 47 years, have 3 beautiful daughters and 6 wonderful, funny, bright grandchildren… and I voted ‘Remain’ in the Referendum. Although I hold strong political views, I’d describe myself as a ‘liberal with socialist leanings’(!). I’ve never voted Conservative in my life and don’t anticipate ever doing so… but, by the same token, I’m definitely no ‘Labour-lefty’.
I wanted to meet a few Tory-voters to chat and compare our current thoughts, concerns, hopes and aspirations. Clearly, I didn’t want to try to ‘convert’ this Tory voter (and, equally, didn’t want to talk to anyone who thought they could persuade me to support Mr Johnson!)… but I did (and do) think there’s an awful lot of healing that needs to happen. These proposed meet-ups wouldn’t be confrontational in any way – they would just be an opportunity to discuss political stuff in a calm, rational (and, who knows, even humorous) way - with me buying the first round!
For the record (in case you didn’t know), I’m a 71 year-old member of the Green Party. I live in Bristol. I’m a retired architect (and ran a successful, medium-sized Buckinghamshire practice for getting on for 30 years). I’ve been very happily married for 47 years, have 3 beautiful daughters and 6 wonderful, funny, bright grandchildren… and I voted ‘Remain’ in the Referendum. Although I hold strong political views, I’d describe myself as a ‘liberal with socialist leanings’(!). I’ve never voted Conservative in my life and don’t anticipate ever doing so… but, by the same token, I’m definitely no ‘Labour-lefty’.
Well, largely as a result of my
facebook plea, I’ve now managed to meet up with three Tory-voters (over the odd
glass!) – all male as it happens (not by choice!).
Somewhat predictably, it proved to be
an illuminating, fascinating… and, at times, frustrating experience.
In the
event (and as anticipated), all three ‘conversations’ were conducted amicably…
there was humour; a general acceptance that the Labour Party’s poor performance
in Opposition had had a direct bearing on the General Election result (at a
time when, arguably, the government’s own performance since 2010 had provided
‘easy targets’ for any opposition party); that the EU Referendum had been
unsatisfactory on various levels; but also a general acceptance of the need to
‘move on’ (perhaps much easier to say if the Party you voted for won!).
I could
write at length about our individual conversations and disagreements/agreements,
but this would probably make very boring reading (not that this is sparkling
‘journalism’!). Indeed, I HAD originally anticipated summarising the
discussions on a whole variety of issues… including Democracy, Party
Leadership, Brexit, Westminster/Politics in General, Climate Crisis/Environment
and Politics over the next 5/10 years.
Instead,
I’ll simply say this:
I found
some comments from two of my ‘friends’ both annoying and somewhat jingoistic –
and, no doubt, they would have their criticisms of my views. At times, I sensed
a certain arrogance in their various and collective stances – along the lines
of “well, your views are very much as we might have predicted… but, sadly for
you, you’re wrong/disillusioned/badly informed… we know better”.
However,
my third meet-up was an altogether different matter… right from the start, we
both accepted the need for a time of healing/need to move on. There were
certainly matters that we had completely different ‘takes’ on, but we were able
to discuss these openly and freely accept the other’s viewpoint. We discussed
our respective backgrounds; we covered a wide range of subjects… and,
crucially, we laughed a lot!
Genuinely, I think this could be the
start of a very rewarding, encouraging friendship – which far exceeds my original expectations.
We’ve agreed to meet up again in due course to continue our wide-ranging
discussions. How lovely is that!?
For me,
I’ve been trying to use this time of post-election reflection as a time of
reconciliation and healing; a time to ‘move on’. In some ways, the time has
been fruitful and worthwhile (perhaps, to underline this process, Lent has come
at a good time for me?), but it’s also proved more difficult than I’d imagined.
I think, perhaps naively, that I’d hoped to have had conversations whereby we
might have been able to agree that there was a ‘better way’; or a compromise
way which addressed various issues and enabled ‘both sides’ to move on together
on some matters; or simply an opportunity to move away from confrontational
politics (perhaps, to some extent, this was achieved).
I feel
passionate about UK politics (don’t get me started on the US version!) and, as
I’ve got older, I think the range of my ‘beliefs’ have become sharper and more
focussed. Perhaps, also, I’ve become less tolerant of others who don’t share my
views (I hope that’s not the case)?
I think we all need to listen more. I
think we need to create opportunities to exchange our views… and, somehow, I
think we need to move away from the world of Party Politics whereby our MPs follow
the Party-line on every issue and ignore the views of their constituents and
the potential for working alongside colleagues – whatever their political
colours - who share similar concerns and aspirations.
I live in hope.
Image: These are words from AA Gill
(in an article ‘The Times’, dated 12 June 2016, just before the EU Referendum)(and
just six months before he died)… I wrote them down in my sketchbook because I
felt they summed many of my own feelings towards those who voted to leave the
EU and to ‘get our country back’… by the same token, sadly, I think they also
sum up the attitudes and sentiments of many (not all) Tory-voters per se
(certainly not my third Tory ‘friend’!).
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